Work Jeff

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A Work Jeff is an office role which is mandatory for all British businesses with more than 10 employees. Although the title 'Jeff' is a courtesy one, and there is no absolute requirement for a Work Jeff to actually be named Jeff, it is a notable coincidence that the majority of Wok Jeffs are called either Jeff or Geoff.


History

Work Jeffs emerged during the recessions of the early 1980s as a means for management to annoy employees to the point that they would leave, reducing the cost to the employer of redundancy payments. The role was made mandatory by the David Cameron Government to curtail the general optimism that had developed in the workplace during the previous Labour Government.

Duties

  • calling their desktop computer the confuser
  • asserting at every mention of the word 'laptop' that they should be called a 'desktop' because no-one uses them on their lap.
  • Tapping the tune of 'Shave and a haircut - two bob' after stirring their tea.